When Your Family Ignores You During A Difficult Time

Where are the phone calls? Asking how I am? I asked my husband, close to tears.

“Oh hun, stop expecting so much from people” he told me. They have their own problems”.

“I get that, I do, but how hard is it to make a phone call? It’s almost like they have gone out of their way to ignore us when we needed them the most.” I argued.

And no matter how hard I tried to accept it, to ignore it, the anger wouldn’t go away. And it continued to simmer.

Anger that during the worst time of our lives, we were abandoned by certain members of our “family” who didn’t so much call us to see how we were coping.

Anger that during the struggle of building a small business, the unexpected litigation we were fighting, the new baby and 2 children we raising, we were ignored.

Like our lives didn’t matter.

Our struggle didn’t matter.

We didn’t matter.

And I won’t lie, I have been angry for a long time.

Until I recently I realised something, transformative.

And that was, my anger wasn’t going to change anybody.

It wasn’t going to change their lack of concern or empathy for what we were going through.

It wasn’t going to change the fact they didn’t care. And probably never will.

It wasn’t going to change the fact that, just maybe we aren’t that important to them as we think we are.

And I couldn’t force them.

Force them to care, force them to call, force them to show love, concern and empathy.

And that sometimes you need to accept that we simply cannot change other people.

And sometimes, the only person you can rely on, to show you love, empathy and concern, is, yourself.

And instead, I decided to channel my anger into something more productive.

I transformed my anger into energy, the energy I needed to fight for myself.

To fight for my family, my children and my business.

And this new type of power I found within, it blew my mind.

And it like it was always there, laying dormant inside me, and like a sleeping lion, it was awaken.

Because sometimes in life we need something terrible to happen us, to find that power. To awaken that lion.

To find the key to our inner strength.

So to those who abandoned us, during this difficult time, I truly thank you.

Because without your absence, I wouldn’t have found my strength.

Because without your absence, I wouldn’t of realised this truth.

That no one is coming to save me. And I learnt to fight alone.

These new bracelets have been inspired by a difficult time I have been going through this year (and still going through).

I learnt a lot about myself this year and who truly matters in my life.

I hope it helps you too. 

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