I won’t lie, there has been 100’s of times I have wanted to quit my business Delta & Co this year.
Wondering if talking my husband into quitting his secure mining job at the start of the year to put all our energy into Delta & Co, when I was due to give birth to my third baby might have been the dumbest move of the century.
Frustrated that I have spent nearly every weekend packing bracelets while my 2 other kids watch their 17th re-run of Shaun the Sheep so I can get orders out in time.
Exhausted as I sit here, trying to rock my baby to sleep as he kicks me in the gut and screams in my ear, while with my free hand I write a hurried Instagram post full of spelling errors and mistakes.
Bone tired after waking up after next to no sleep hanging off the side of the bed with a baby jammed up against my back, bleary-eyed I stumble out of bed at 4 am to go and check on my ads, only to discover they were tanking overnight.
Pissed that after organising to get some professional photos for my website, I've spend a pretty dime only to get them back and realise that my hair is a dishevelled mess and all the pics have my bra strap sticking out.
That I have been hit with unexpected costs that have taken everything we have earned from our all hard work and effort this year. So we have basically worked our asses off for the whole fucking year for nothing.
That our mortgage is getting close to its limit and I am surprised we haven’t got a call from the bank yet asking what on earth is going on.
That my husband is losing his cool, the most self-controlled person I know is cracking, which in turn is worsening his chronic pain issues, and that I am surprised we haven’t gotten divorced yet given the circumstances.
And I realised that I suck as a parent and wife just as much as I quite possibly suck at running a business.
It’s called “Entrepreneur’s Remorse."
But then I get emails like this....
"I bought this band as a gift to myself. I struggle with depression and have 2 kids with special needs. Each day is a struggle and I regularly feel very unappreciated. Now I look at my band and persist! Doing everything I can to make sure my kids can become the very best people they can."
"I bought this for a friend going through a difficult time. It’s beautifully made and looks fabulous when she wears it. She’s said when she’s having ‘one of those’ days, she touches/reads the bracelet to remind herself how awesome she is and it gives her the strength to get through the day."
And then this.
"Bought this for myself and my friend. I am currently going through chemo and she has her own health problems. Just a little reminder to her that if I’m not around as much I’m still thinking of her."
And then I remember my “why”.
The very reason I created Delta & Co in the first place.
The whole point of this whole exercise.
And as our “About Us” that I wrote with so much love, care and thought reads....
“We are women determined to live our best life and turn dreams into reality.
We persevere in the face of obstacles, the self-doubt and those who try to tear us down, and will not stop until we reach our destination.
We've failed, we've stumbled and made mistakes, yet we are not defined by our past.
We learn, grow stronger and climb back up every single day.
We are victors, not victims. We are fearless Queens.
And we are unstoppable.”
And I then feel a sense of purpose again.
A fire lights up inside me, call it passion if you will, my resolve grows stronger, and I decide that, despite the hell of a year so far, the circumstances that nearly crushed my spirt, my family, and my business,
Nevertheless, I will persist.
And no matter what you are going through, you too, can do this.
You need to muster up the strength that I know is deep inside of you, to keep going, and I promise with my all heart, you will get through the darkness, and reach the light.
Nevertheless, you MUST persist.
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